If Everything is Perfect, Why Am I Not Living a Life I Love?

Written by Suzanne Eder | June 18, 2013 |

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There is a concept that many of us on a spiritual path have been introduced to – the idea and understanding that “everything is perfect” – which I’ve noticed can generate more than a little confusion…and frustration. Sure, it’s easy to feel that everything is perfect when you’re on a roll and wonderful things keep showing up in your experience. It’s not so easy to acknowledge that everything is perfect when things aren’t going your way.

I’ve come to understand that “everything is perfect” has multiple layers of meaning, but the one I want to focus on here is this: everything we experience is a perfect reflection of our vibration – our intentions, beliefs, thoughts, language and action. If we believe that life is a struggle, that’s what we’ll experience. If we believe we are somehow “not enough,” we’ll keep finding ourselves in circumstances where that appears to be true. If we believe men are jerks, we’ll keep bumping into men who are…jerky.

And if we believe we are whole and worthy and talented and valuable, those beliefs will be reflected back to us in myriad ways – through work we love, vibrant health, satisfying relationships and fulfilling, creative self-expression. We’ll be successful in ways that are meaningful to us.

Of course, most of us experience quite a mix of circumstances, because most of us are quite a mix of vibrations. Some of the signals we’re sending out will generate experiences we like, others will generate experience we don’t like. If we don’t understand the vibrational component, simply telling ourselves, “Everything is perfect” when things don’t go the way we want can eventually lead to stagnation. (Note I said it can lead to stagnation, not that it will. There is a way that “Everything is perfect” can be immensely helpful, which I’ll get to in a moment.)

Sometimes, when people say “Everything is perfect” when their life situation is anything but, what’s underneath that statement is something along these lines: “Life works in mysterious ways. I don’t know why this is happening, and I can’t see any good coming from it, but spiritual people say that everything is perfect so I’m just going to trust that and keep going.” There is a sense of powerlessness, a feeling that “life happens” and the best I can do is float along. Certain unwelcome patterns repeat thsmselves, but if I keep telling myself only that everything is perfect, I won’t make the inner shifts that will create outer shifts in my circumstances.

And that’s what I mean when I say that the unexamined statement, “Everything is perfect,” can create stagnation. Unwanted experiences, especially recurring ones, are an invitation to pause and reflect on what we’re intending or believing that could be calling them into our experience. Yes, they are perfect: perfect reflections of our vibration. So now it’s time to get curious! Here are a few simple questions we can ask ourselves about things that show up in our lives that we don’t like:

  • What is this reflecting back to me?
  • What does it help me to notice about my beliefs?
  • What does this reveal about the way I feel about myself?
  • What could I shift in my attitude or perception that might generate a different experience?

A full exploration of how to recognize and shift the vibrations that create our unwanted experiences is more than I can cover in a single blog post, of course. (Stay tuned for my upcoming online course which will lead you through this step by step!) I just wanted to encourage you to start reclaiming your power to create a life you love by becoming willing to see the relationship between your beliefs and thoughts, and the life you’re living. It’s far more empowering to realize, “I created this, and I can create something else” than to say, “Life happens…”

Now, this doesn’t mean I want you to go crazy trying to “figure out” how you created every specific thing that shows up in your life. Not at all! That would tangle you up in a level of self-analysis that would likely lead to self-judgment – or at least paralysis – and that is never helpful. In fact, that’s where a simple, “Everything is perfect” can be quite helpful. Sometimes, we really can’t see how our vibration has created the situation we’re in. So it’s best, in that moment, to let it go. Reminding ourselves that “Everything is perfect” is a way to release resistance and call a time-out to any unproductive self-analysis we may have initiated. We can intend for any insights we need to show up, and simply remain open and curious.

So if you’re not living a life you really love, don’t try to convince yourself you are by telling yourself that everything is perfect. Be willing to make a stand for the life you want, and be willing to recognize that you can create it as you shift your intentions, beliefs and thoughts.

Yes, you can.

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